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Top 10 Best Ways to Get Out of Jury Duty

#10

 

When the lawyers start questioning you, plead the fifth.
 
#9
 

Tell the judge that you're prejudiced against ALL races.

 
#8
 

Wear a t-shirt that says "Capital punishment for all!"

 
#7
 

Tell the judge that you're actually a visitor from another planet and the "prime directive" prevents you from interfering in the lives of the natives.

 
#6
 

Knock over a liquor store--this should get you your own trial, and you won't have to bother with anyone else's.

 
#5
 

Ask if all five of your personalities will have a chance to vote.

 
#4
 

Ask the judge if she can help you get a role on “Law and Order.”

 
#3
 

Tell the judge you'll make a great juror, as you can spot guilty people just by looking at them. (If this doesn't secure your immediate release, point at the judge and scream: "Guilty!")

 
#2
 

Move to a country that doesn't bother with trials.

 
#1
 

Don't register to vote.

DISCLAIMER: We're not actually suggesting that you skip out on your civic responsibility, of course. Everybody should serve on a jury now and then. Just bring a good book.

 
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